Wednesday, March 16, 2011

The CulPeeper

Recently my neighborhood has been terrorized by a peeping Tom and for weeks the city police and sheriff’s department have been trying to catch this elusive creature, but our peeper seems to be crafter than the cat that leaves foot prints on your car in the middle of the night. Sort of ironic considering both the sheriff and police stations are only about half a mile away.

I don’t know why he would pick this neighborhood as it consisted mainly of D.C. commuters.  I felt rather safe knowing that I was surrounded by neighbors that worked for the FBI, CIA and the prison system, plus my own ability to pump a shot gun with one hand while pressing the talk button on my intercom system.

Late one evening I was startled by the gaggle of cop cars plowing into the neighborhood with their lights and sirens blaring.  Out my back window I could see my neighbor Mr. CIA running out his front door with his gun still strapped on him from work.  He dashed around to the front of his neighbor house where I could see our ninja peeper just jumping over the four foot fence.  The police all jumped out of their cars and rushed to get through the fence to catch their assailant, which at this point would not seem to be very hard as our genius of a peeper managed to fall into the 6 foot deep hole the pool man just dug earlier that day and now lay splayed at the bottom with a broken leg.  All I can say is that our peeping Tom was very luck the pool man hit solid rock at 6 feet because the plans called for a 10 foot hole to accommodate a tall diving board.

8 comments:

  1. EEWWW. There are to many sick people in this world. You know--Ted Bundy started off as a peeper.

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  2. Oh, man. What a lunatic! I assume that they caught the crazy sicko? I wonder what the punishment is for someting like that. Does he get counseling and stuff while in jail?

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  3. You have the craziest neighborhood. Seriously, dead bodies, peeping Tom's, it is like an episode of Twin Peaks over there. Hahaha

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  4. Man...your neighborhood must be a plethora of inspiration for you! I wanna live next to CIA and FBI agents...LOL. Seriously though, how creepy! And he's able to avoid all the police and agents, he'll mess up and get caught.

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  5. Yes he was caught, the ambulance had to peel him off the bottom of the pool hole!

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  6. Aww now ya know if you see Obama running through the yards one night being chased by a bunch of agents THEN you should really worry. Meanwhile Dig a two foot hold under each window then sit back and grin? lol Just being silly but down here in Georgia we shoot first then ask if he wants another look. *nods sagely*

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  7. Wow, you must never lack for inspiriation... I think you live in the start of a lot of movies I've seen! ;)

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  8. I have Naked Neighbor. I have no issue if you want to walk inside your own home naked, just lower your window blinds please!

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